Hello everyone, I hope you’re having a lovely morning/afternoon/evening! I don’t know about you, but I love jokes. My favorites are anti-jokes—jokes whose answers are the no-duh sort of answers. I love them. Today, I wanted to share a whole assortment, dad, anti-, and knock-knock jokes with you. Perhaps they’ll put a smile on your face; perhaps they’ll make you roll your eyes in exasperation. Either way, let’s dig in!

– Dad Jokes –

1. Two guys walked into a bar. The third guy ducked.
2. Why are elevator jokes so good and classy? They work on so many levels.
3. Why do nurses like to have red crayons? They sometimes have to draw blood.
4. Why are bees’ hair sticky? They use honeycomb.
5. How can you tell it’s a dogwood tree? By its bark.
6. Why is Peter Pan always flying? Because he Neverlands.
7. I used to hate facial hair. Then it grew on me.
8. When does a joke become a dad joke? When it becomes apparent.

– Anti-Jokes –

1. Why don’t vampires like garlic? You have to exist to like garlic.
2. What’s green, red, blue, orange, purple, and yellow? The rainbow.
3. Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn’t. Numbers are not sentient and, therefore, can’t feel emotions.
4. What makes everyone smile? Face muscles.
5. What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
6. What did the grape say when it was squished? Nothing; grapes don’t speak.
7. Guess what I saw today? Everything I looked at.
8. What’s red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

– Knock-Knock Jokes –

1. Knock! Knock! Who’s there? Needle! Needle, who? Needle little help getting in the door!
2. Knock! Knock! Who’s there? Dejav! Dejav, who? Knock! Knock!
3. Knock! Knock! Who’s there? Baa! Baa, who? Make up your mind. Are you a sheep or an owl?
4. Knock! Knock! Who’s there? Figs! Figs, who? Figs the doorbell; it’s broken!
5. Knock! Knock! Who’s there? Ken! Ken, who? Ken I come in? It’s cold out here.
6. Knock! Knock! Who’s there? A broken pencil! A broken pencil, who? Nevermind; it’s pointless.
7. Knock! Knock! Who’s there? Cargo! Cargo, who? Cargo ‘beep, beep!’
8. Knock! Knock! Who’s there? Wire! Wire who? Wire you always asking ‘who’s there?’

That’s all I have! I got all these from yellowoctopus.com, parade.com, and rd.com in case you want to see even more. I hope you enjoyed these jokes, and I hope that you chuckled even just a bit! If you have any jokes that you would like to share or want to tell us your fav jokes from those listed above, feel free to drop them down in the comments below! As always, keep on inspiring folks and loving yourself!